Can You Spell P-A-T-H-E-T-I-C?

Whose face and name do you want to see on a “Browns” bag?  We may start seeing more and more of the pictures below outside Cleveland Browns Stadium.

The Browns were whipped today in Baltimore 34-3 against the Ravens.  No touchdowns for Cleveland, again.  Quinn takes more sacks – now 10 in as many quarters of football.  He gets replaced by Anderson who throws three picks in the second half.  We demonstrate zero offense.  Our offensive line from Mack to St. Clair to Womack gets creamed on every down.  Cribbs gains a lot of yards on returns for not.

So now what?  How do we avoid remaining the worst team in pro football this season?  Any suggestions?

To be frank, we cannot think of anything that will have an immediate and significant impact on winning or losing football games, at least not with the current roster.

We have just four suggestions for what they are worth.  First, do not fire anyone.  Although it is tempting to send Daboll back to coaching ringette, all that would do is create even more uncertainty into an already very timid and confused offensive unit.  Instead, burn the conservative playbook.  Second, go back to Quinn as the starter at home against the Bengals next week.  Anderson threw the football with much more conviction than Brady in the second half today, but Derek’s accuracy is as bad as ever.  Besides, three weeks with Brady at the helm is not sufficient.  He needs a longer leash than that.  Quinn is a very skittish quarterback.  We have to accept that, in order to overcome his shyness in the pocket, Brady will need to throw the football down the field which will, in turn, make him vulnerable to turnovers.  That is a fact.  Get him out of the pocket more often.   Third, mix up the offensive line.  Bench St. Clair or at least separate him and Womack, even if that means more substitutions.  Fourth, start using Lawrence Vickers more as both a rusher and a receiver out of the backfield.  Vickers is by far one of our most underrated players.  He has already caught a 12-yard pass this year on the single throw to him.  He deserves a chance to do more than block in order to try to spark a completely non-existent running game.

Our defense has its own problems, but the offense needs the most immediate attention.

There is a bright side to nearly everything.  Before this debacle over the last three weeks, few would seriously have predicted that the Browns would beat either the Vikings or the Ravens.  So, frankly, we are 0-3 when we should be 1-2.  Our offense is worse than anyone’s nightmare a month ago, true.  Depressing indeed.

-Clayton