Cleveland Browns: Landry’s and Gordon’s awkward workout conversations

Listening in on awkward conversations that never actually happened between Josh Gordon and Jarvis Landry of the Cleveland Browns

Wide receiver Jarvis Landry just got a sweet 5-year, $75.5 million deal with the Cleveland Browns, $47 million of that guaranteed. This means that (unofficially) he’ll make about $9.4 million for playing next season.

Then we take a sad stroll over to the other side of the wide receiver negotiation tracks.

There we see poor Josh Gordon, who’s just signed on as an exclusive rights free agent. This means he’ll ‘only’ make about $790,000 for playing next season.

That’s less than a tenth of what Landry’s making.

Fair or unfair?

Regardless, it must make for some uncomfortable moments this week as the Browns officially begin their offseason workout program. Oh, to be a fly on the walls of their workout facility in Berea, Ohio and hear the awkward conversations that may or may not (most probably not) be taking place between those two men this week.

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Fortunately, Dawg Pound Daily has just such a fly.

First, our DPD fly buzzes over to the Browns facility’s main locker room where returning players are slowly filing in after being away for some time. Landry arrives carrying a large black bag over his shoulder and he walks towards his locker, three over from Gordon’s.

Landry (fist bumps): Yo, Flash, what up?

Gordon (returns fist bump): What up, Juice? You good?

Landry (opens his black bag and slowly begins transferring stacks of 100’s to his locker): Yup. You?

Gordon: Maaan…

Two hours later our nosey DPD fly buzzes over to the playing field and lands on a rack of balls near where Landry and Gordon are waiting to run practice routes.

Quarterback Tyrod Taylor (flipping a ball to himself): You two ready to bring it this season?

Gordon (stretching his hammies): You know I am, T-2. Just get the ball close.

Landry (tosses a handful of hundo stacks to Taylor, winks and points his thumb to his own chest): And often.

Gordon: Maaan…

Finally, at noon our fearless DPD fly lands on the crowded lunch table as dozens of large Browns players noisily chow down their enormous meals.

Taylor (eating curly-fries, tosses one to tight end David Njoku): We gonna confuse some linebackers and free safeties this season, Chief?

Njoku (catches the curly-fry with his mouth): You know we gonna tear those secondary’s up, T-Squared. (He tosses one of his chicken nuggets to Landry.) You with us, Juice?

Landry (catches the nug in his mouth and swallows it without chewing): We gonna do this all the way, Chief. Who else is in?

Gordon (with his mouth open waiting for a toss): Me! Me!

Landry: Aw, you hungry, Flash? (tosses him a fat stack of Benjamins) Go on and buy you some groceries.

(Everyone laughs and points and our DPD fly buzzes over and lands on Gordon’s head.)

Next: Browns Draft Profile: RB Rashaad Penny

Gordon: Maaaan.

(Splat)